manners are for children Part 2

As a follow up to my Manners are for Children post, I turned to my trusty Emily Post encyclopedia.

It's honestly one of my favorite books EVER. I know this sounds lame, it is -a little bit- but it is so incredibly helpful that I turn to it at least once a month. Emily's daughter Peggy put together the book and the index is very comprehensive, but like an encyclopedia, it's divided up into sections.I went straight for the "Children and Teens" section to see how my ideas matched up to Madam Post's rules.
I'll quote from what she says and you can match them up to my earlier post. (In the future, I'll probably put the two in the same post together.)

"A guest's first duty is to show up on time and greet the host courteously.
Respect the host's home: No rough play. no peeking in drawers or handling valuables. No feet on the furniture." (sounds a little like Francine's home, no?)
Children should also: "Accept food that is served, Cooperate and participate in activities, Offer to help, Thank the host and leave on time."

I agree with all of the above. I do not have my own children (obviously) but this is how my siblings and I were expected to behave, and we did. It may seem like a lot of rules but in reality this is not a lot to expect from a child who is at least 8 years old.
Agree? Disagree? Shoot me a comment and let me know how you feel!

{It is also polite to cite the sources you use in any writing you do. So here, in MLA format is my recognition...}

Post, Peggy, and Emily Post. Emily Post's Etiquette. New York: HarperCollins, 2004. Print.

manners are for children

What I mean by "manners are for children," is that they should be learned at a young age. My parents harped on my manners when I was little, to the point that sometimes I wanted to be rude, just to see the shock on their faces. Now though, I am proud of myself when someone compliments them. It's much easier to teach kids habits like these when they're little.

Today I was babysitting my favorite little kids, Charlie (3) and Lauren (17 months). As we were cleaning up the basement, the show "Olivia" came on the television in the background and we sat to watch. I was amazed at the subject matter! Normally kids shows are about sharing and playing nice but today, Olivia was agonizing over table manners. Her younger brother was messy at the table and her friend Francine apparently comes from a background where that's not allowed. Francine also "never eats the same thing twice in one year" and brought her lunch to school in a bento box. Olivia is intrigued and Francine invites her over for dinner one night.

As Olivia gets excited to dine in a more civilized place than her home, her mother reminds her to "Be polite, and return the information." As Olivia imagines a fancy girl like Francine eating at the dinner table where her brother slurps spaghetti, she pictures her family as cave people who eat off of rocks. Needless to say, in Olivia's imagination, Francine runs away screaming.

Once Olivia arrives at Francine's house she discovers there are a lot of rules that are not necessarily kid friendly. Such as, "No yelling, No footprints in the house, No fresh flowers in the house (the petals make a mess), No laughing at the dinner table and most significantly, No spilling!" Unfortunately, Olivia drops a Brussels sprout and she and Francine are sent to sit in a corner of the room at a "kiddie table"

Moral of the Story: Manners are a terrific thing to have and you don't need to be "fancy," or "special," to display them. It was very thoughtful of Olivia to bring flowers to Francine's mother in thanks for the invite, and it was polite to invite Francine to come for dinner at her house too.

Some basic manners from this 20 minute TV show were not even present among the 16-18 year old girls who were at my house for my sister's pasta party on Wednesday. They were supposed to bring drinks or dessert, my mom did all the cooking (for 17 kids). When dinner was over, there was one box of cookies for dessert because as my mom so eloquently said, "Some of them just came in swinging their arms." It is polite to bring SOMETHING to a person's house when they are doing something for you, whether it's a meal, a sleepover, or just a swim in the pool. You should never show up empty handed. In an older setting these are considered hostess gifts, but for younger children, they are thank you gifts.